The classic Stoics – Epictetus, Seneca, and Marcus Aurelius – established the Dichotomy of Control as a central pillar of Stoicism. Basically, they stated there are things within our power to control, and things we have no power to control. For example, we can control our self-beliefs and goals, and we have no control of if the sun rises. A lot of today’s Stoic followers break the dichotomy into a trichotomy. Instead of things we control and don’t control, there are things we control, there are things we don’t control, and there are things we somewhat control. Since I just gave examples of the Dichotomy of Control, I’m not going to go into any more detail on things we control and things we don’t. I’m going to focus on things we somewhat control.
Tennis as an Example
I’m currently reading A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy by William B Irvine. In his breakdown of the Trichotomy of Control, he uses tennis as an example and I think it’s fitting. In this sport, we don’t have control over winning or losing. According to our definition of the Dichotomy of Control, no Stoic would take on an activity outside of their control. But, by defining control with a trichotomy we can see why a Stoic would play tennis.
Although winning a tennis match is beyond a Stoic’s control, practice and excellence at tennis are within a person’s control. The thing we’re able to control is our goals for ourselves in how excellent we get at tennis, not the result.
If we set realistic expectations for ourselves, then winning or losing a tennis match doesn’t matter. What matters is reflecting on our ability to achieve our goal. If we determine we reached our goal then we have succeeded in controlling something within our control. If we did not reach our tennis goal then we did not achieve in controlling something within our control.
As you can see, the important part of doing stuff somewhat in our control is working towards things within our control and not worrying about external outcomes (like achieving our personal goals in tennis without being upset we lost to someone better).
Applying the Trichotomy to Success
Kylon Geinger, the renowned host of The Successful Dropout podcast, posted on Facebook “First, realize that ‘success’ is relative. It means different things to different people. But it almost always means you are building, creating, and working towards something that will make your life and the lives of others better.” I think this is extremely important when defining any word. We all have different meanings of what “success” is, but we can almost universally agree it means “building, creating, and working towards something.” With that definition in mind, we can break down what “success” means from a Stoic point of view.
Let’s say “success” to an individual means having a million dollars in her bank account. Now, netting a million dollars isn’t in her control nor is it out of her control. It falls into the somewhat in her control category. If she sets out to have a net profit of a million dollars and fails to achieve it she might consider herself a failure. However, if she sets goals for herself, like starting a new business venture every year, she’ll have complete control over that.
In 10 years, if she continues to pour hard work and determination into her business ventures, she’ll be achieving her goal. She can claim herself as successful. Starting 10 businesses in 10 years will probably result in becoming a millionaire, which would mean she’s achieved her “dream” of success, but that’s not the outcome she succeeded at achieving, nor the outcome she has complete control over.
Success is Excelling at What’s Controllable
Stoicism is about cutting out negative emotions. If we set goals for things outside of our control then there is always a chance for failure. If, however, we set goals within our control that we foresee will lead to the uncontrollable goal then we are putting ourselves in a situation to succeed. Even if we don’t reach the out-of-our-control goal we still will have achieved our controllable goal, and thus can consider ourselves successful.