Unless you were homeschooled growing up, odds are you spent at least ten years in school. For me, I spent seventeen years in the public education system (K-12 and four years of college). During those years I was trained to do things by the books and stay within the rubric. Not only did I have to follow instructions to get a good grade, I also had to show respect for my superiors and ask permission to do nearly anything. Go to the bathroom, make a comment, try a creative approach to a problem. All of this required permissions.
Even if I didn’t know it, my brain built up a permission-based mindset to think for itself. My brain wouldn’t let me deploy creative ideas or get shit done because it had to ask itself if those things were okay. A lot of times my creativity is outside social norms. Meaning, my brain had to ask permission to do these non-traditional actions and a lot of times the permission wouldn’t be granted. Thoughts like “No, that’s not realistic” or “Yeah, that’s a cool idea but you can’t actually try that,” often ran through my head.
Today, I still have problems fighting my permission-based mind. It’s hard to tear down the thoughts that have been with me for my whole life. But I do a few daily practices that help me fight my permission-needing mind.
- I blog daily. This habit makes me step outside my comfort zone. I also share it on social media (Facebook and sometimes Twitter) to keep me accountable and keep me from hiding from readers. This helps my mind realize I can create things from scratch and don’t need anyone’s permission.
- Another habit I’ve developed is writing in a journal. Both stating things I want to accomplish and things I’m gracious for. The journaling trick makes my mind focus on the steps I have taken and where I can move forward. It keeps my mind from falling into the trap of “I need someone’s permission” and helps my habits work towards cultivating the life I want.
- The last thing I have been doing is making my desires/goals public. I try and share what I’m up to or content I want to write with people every day. The one thing I don’t want to do is fail to follow-through. By stating these things publicly, and to stakeholders in my outcomes, I cannot hide behind my permission-based brain. I have to step forward and do it.
Although I still struggle with this, I have been fighting hard over the past couple months to keep my permission-based brain at bay. Each day I make sure I’m achieving results and reaching toward my vision of success. I don’t think I’ll ever completely destroy my permission mentality but the more things I do to fight it, the further back in my thought-process it’ll go.